Jocelyn's Comm 303 Blog

During the semester I have learned a lot about writing for the media. These are three area’s in which I still need to work on and pay closer attention to:

1. Using quotes. In my feature project, I had trouble knowing when to capitalize words and where to place commas. On quiz #7, I also did not know when to capitalize a word and when to leave something lowercase. Now I know that when the phrase is a complete sentence, the first word in the sentence should be capitalized.
2. Using numerals versus words for numbers. On quiz #15 I did not understand why the number two was appropriate instead of the word two. Now I know that numerals are used for ages and measurements on all occasions.
3. Checking over my work. A lot of my mistakes were careless ones. I made a careless error on quiz #11. If I would have just checked back over my work, I would have seen the error and corrected it.

Since I did my 11.1 assignment on the YMCA information, I feel like the following blogs would be interested in hearing the news of the new swimming classes.

http://mom-blog.com/ – A blog for moms that has to do with all things parenting. Readers may want to sign their children up for swimming lessons.

http://swimming.about.com/b/ – Matt Lubber blogs about all things swimming. He posted thoughts on the best way to teach children to swim. He can inform readers about the lessons offered by the YMCA.

http://www.busydadblog.com/ – Since this dad is so busy, he may be interested in signing his son up for the lessons, and maybe his readers will be interested as well

http://city-voice.blogspot.com/ – I personalized the assignment by having it take place in my hometown of Danville, VA. This blogger claims to be the city voice, so he can spread the world about what is going on at the YMCA.

http://www.child-autism-parent-cafe.com/child-with-autism-blog.html – Maybe enrolling a child with autism in the swimming lessons would be a good way to help them develop certain social skills, but I would suggest the parents consult a doctor or counselor before doing so.

I listened to National Public Radio on npr.com. They have an hourly update of the latest news. Each clip is about five minutes long. In the clip there was a story about the new contract between the Washington, D.C. school board and the teachers’ union. NPR used the wrap element. The reporter gave the over-view of the story and then you heard sound bites from a member of the school board and a teacher. The reporter came back in to finish up the story. I like this element because it lets the listener hear the voices of the people involved, which adds a personal touch to the story.

One way in which news radio is different from print reporting is  people can get the information quicker. They can do other things while still getting their news. When someone has to read the news, they can do little else, unless they read it on the morning commute. Listening to the news, especially online, allows the listener to multitask. If the option is available, the listener can pause the news, do something else and come back to it at a later time.

I found this story on The New York Times Web site. It is about suicides in India. Along with it, there were readers comments, a link to a biographical page about India, and a few pictures of people devastated by the loss of family members or friends. I like the reader’s comments and the link that lets the reader know more about India. The pictures used were vivid and showed a lot of emotion. These elements help to bring the story full circle and give the reader as much information as possible.

This story from The L.A. Times about the offshore drilling is another good new package. It has more different kinds of multimedia to go with it, including a map of drilling plan. It includes related stories from outside The L.A. Times, which gives readers the option to see what other news outlets are reporting.

This story found in The Dallas Morning News is not a good news package. The only visual aid it has is a picture of someone using an iPhone. It has links to related stories about Apple, but it also has links to stories about IBM. I don’t think those IBM stories belong there.

Two men attempted to rob Delia Moss, 83, at gunpoint, yesterday, outside of the McDonalds on Pickett Road.

Fairfax Police Sgt. D’Andre Shields says the old lady swung her purse and knocked the gun into the bushes. One suspect, Josh Auerbach, 40, is in custody. His accomplice, a white male in his mid-30s with a buzz cut and a short gray beard, wearing glasses and a pink sweater, is still at large.

Three students from the Alpha Beta Zeta fraternity were admitted to a local hospital early Sunday morning and were diagnosed with alcohol poisoning. One is listed in critical condition.

Press Martin, a junior, engineering major from Shethar, N.D. and Rob Smith, a sophomore, business major from here in town were released on Monday morning, but freshmen, liberal arts major Al Amalek, from Nashville, Tenn. is in critical condition.

University president Harvey Smithville restated the previous policy that banned alcohol from any fraternity house located on campus property or within campus environs. The policy states: “any fraternity in which the members have alcohol will be immediately suspended. A second offense with a year will result in the banning of that fraternity for five years.”

Interfraternity Council president Bart Addison said the council agrees with President Smithville and alcohol should not be allowed at fraternity parties.  The university also released a statement saying witnesses saw the young men drinking and the fraternity will be suspended. Jan Mize, representative from the university’s public relations department, said that a one-year suspension usually results from these circumstances and actions.

Addison believes the entire fraternity should not be blamed and he hopes the president will reconsider the suspension of the ABZ’s.

The 2010 Winter Olympics began on Feb. 12 and concluded on Feb. 28. I felt like it lasted a lifetime. The length was only 16 days but to me it seemed like it lasted for the entire month of February. I heard more about it than I heard about Black History Month.

Everyday on Twitter, CNN, Headline News, USA Network and NBC, something about the winter olympics dominated the media. One reason may be because of the death of Nodar Kumaritashvili before the games began. His death was tragic and affected lots of people. It wasn’t a good way to begin the games but I can’t help but think that his death brought more publicity to the winter olympics. Another reason it may have gotten so much media coverage is because it doesn’t happen every year. That gives it prominence over other things because it is a rare occurence.

Congratulations to Canada for winning 14 gold medals, the most in the history of the Winter Olympics. The most recent medal they won was for men’s hockey. The United States won nine medals.

This past weekend three students from the Alpha beta Zeta fraternity were admitted to a local hospital early Sunday morning and were diagnosed with alcohol poisoning.

Press Martin, junior, engineering major;  from Shethar, N.D.; Al Amalek, freshmen, liberal arts major; from Nashville, Tenn. And Rob Smith, sophomore, business major from here in town, had been partying at the ABZ house. Martin and Smith were released on Monday morning, but Amalek is still in the hospital and is listed in critical condition.

University president Harvey Smithville gave this statement restated the previous policy that banned alcohol from any fraternity house located on campus property or within campus environs. The policy states: “any fraternity in which the members have alcohol will be immediately suspended. A second offense with a year will result in the banning of that fraternity for five years.”

Interfraternity Council president Bart Addison issued a statement: “We wholeheartedly agree with President Smithville that alcohol has no place at fraternity parties.”  The university also released a statement: “Our initial investigation indicates that these young men were at a party in the ABZ house. A number of witnesses say alcohol was being consumed by them. Based on that, we are suspending the fraternity and all its activities on campus. We have not decided how long the suspension will last.” Jan Mize, representative from the universitiy’s public relations department, says that a one-year suspension usually results from these circumstances and actions.

Addison says he does” not believe that the entire fraternity should be held responsible” and he will “ask President Smithville to reconsider his suspension of the ABZ’s.”

Straight lead from the News & Record, Greensboro, NC

HIGH POINT — U.S. Rep. Howard Coble said Friday he is feeling better and plans to return to Washington on Monday after resting this weekend.

Anecdotal lead from The Chicago Sun-Times

Enter the Internet’s information highway — and follow the signs to American Indian sites — and you will discover the profoundly spiritual meaning of the term “red road.”

Summary lead from Danville Register & Bee (My hometown paper!!)

C.J. Barksdale recorded 14 points, 15 rebounds and seven blocks as the George Washington boys pasted Halifax County 64-46 in a Western Valley District semifinal Thursday night in Danville.

One lead that does not work is this one from the Los Angelas Times

Tiger Woods apologized to his fans Friday, saying he was deeply sorry for his “irresponsible and selfish behavior.”

I don’t know if it is the formatting of the website or if the writer just did not form the story correctly but the lead is too short and blends in with the rest of the story

Another lead that does not work is this one from the Dallas Morning News.

Rather than bending to market realities and just putting Flash on the iPad, Jobs is insisting that the various content providers (in this case, The Wall Street Journal) he needs to make the iPad a success dump Flash in favor of… something.

Maybe since this is an article in a special section of the paper, those interested in technology will know what the writer is talking about. But, if he wants more people to read it, he should not use so much jargon. Maybe the terms are explained later in the article, but a reader may not get that far if he or she cannot decipher the language used in the lead.

This lead from the Fairfax Times puts the worng information in the wrong places.

A conservative group is calling on legislators to slash the state payroll and state employee salaries as part of its “commonsense” plan to balance Virginia’s budget.

Later in the article, they give the proper name of the group. I feel that they should have put the proper name of the group in the lead and then said it was a conservative group in the second paragraph. If I were a liberal, as soon as I saw the words “conservative group”, I may have stopped reading and not even get the whole story.

Ellie Maston, of  313 Journey Road, filed a $100,000 neglegence lawsuit in Circuit Court against Amburn’s Produce Market for green beans left on the floor.

Maston walked through the green beans, slipped and broke her hip. Because of the accident, which took place on April 1, Maston “suffered permanent bodily and mental injuries, incurred mediacal expenses and lost income.”